the anomymous booty call

So it’s midnight. On a Wednesday. I have an eight a.m. the next morning. I’m walking my dumb ass across campus for a booty call off of Yik Yak. 

Yeah . . . I know . . . You think it’s embarrassing that you met your boyfriend on Tinder, try meeting him on Yik Yak. I mean, c’mon, I can’t be the only desperate person for sex on campus right? I mean obviously not, because he was the one that posted the thing, but still. Don’t tell me you haven’t seen these posts before. Usually in the late night or early morning, the ideal time for the sex deprived creepers on campus to become desperate enough to post out their horniness in an attempt to find another desperate enough girl to answer. 

 

        Trust me, even on the way there I was questioning my motivates. Not to mention pride. Then I remembered that I had none. The pride, I mean. I just wanted to get laid and that was enough for motivation. 

I know this is starting to sound like the beginning of a horror movie… don’t worry, it’s not. I mean the relationship was but the first night was just a red balloon over the rain grate.  

Besides, we didn’t even sleep together that night. I know. My whole motivation for going out that night in the first place and I didn’t even get laid. What the fuck, right? I had gotten to his dorm. He let me inside. Closed the door to his bedroom. And then reality kicked in, what am I doing? 

 

“Um, sorry but I don’t know if I can really have sex with a stranger…”  

 

I know, subtle. I walked all the way over there for nothing. He surprisingly doesn’t end up kicking me out. Instead, I am seated in the corner of his bed while he lies back against his pillows. We sit in awkward silence for awhile until I begin to ask questions back and forth trying to figure out why he was on Yik Yak in the first place. 

 

“I’m a senior, about to graduate in a few months, and I’m still a virgin. At twenty-two, I’m still a virgin.” 

 

“Wait seriously?”, I guffawed. “And you were going to lose it to a random person off of Yik Yak?” Who does that?! 

He shrugged. “I just wanted to get it over with and hoped whoever showed up wouldn’t be too ugly.” 

 

“Okay, but Yik Yak?” 

 

“Hey, you answered it.” Shit. 

 

“Touche.” 

 

I looked around his room, looking for more ways to make a person out of this stranger. 

 

“What’s the board game over there?” 

 

“Oh that’s Blockade. Do you want to play?” 

 

“Uh, yeah . . . Sure.” Definitely not the games I came over to play, but whatever. 

 

We stayed up through the night, playing board games and talking. He ranted to me about his ex girlfriend. He narrated his summer internship out in Boston. He laughed with me about his brother who lived downstairs in the same dorm. He even showed me several drawing pads filled with scribblings and notes. By sunrise, I had moved from the corner of the bed to sit next to him.  

 

“Well you said you had class right? I don’t want to keep you.” He seemed reluctant. 

  I got up to start putting on my converse. “Yeah, you’re probably right.” Now I’m tired and I still didn’t get laid. 

 

“Now should I get up to get breakfast, or go back to bed?”, he mused to himself. 

 

“Well if you stay in bed, I’ll join you and we can both go to sleep . . .” Better than nothing. 

 

He threw open the covers. “I like that option better.” 

After a while I fell asleep next to him. He didn’t end up losing his virginity to a stranger, but he did cheat on me with some- strangers he paid, nonetheless. But who would’ve thought the desperate stranger looking for a booty call could become someone human enough to hurt me. 

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